His Guiding Light
by XQR
Summary: After the Mark of Mastery exam, Riku decides it's time to confess to Sora, but Sora doesn't quite get it at first. Fluff to start followed by Riku probing Sora further to see how far their relationship can go. SoRiku.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I am in Kingdom Hearts hell waiting for KH3. I just finished DDD again and got smacked with the SoRiku feels, as one does.

 **His Guiding Light**

He had done it… He had freed Sora from sleep. And yet, when he woke, the first face he saw was Mickey's. The sound of Sora fighting over a piece of cake reached his ears. He barely had a chance to sit up before his best friend was hugging him tight and giving him a big kiss on the cheek. Riku felt light-headed, but whether that was because he had just woken up, he couldn't tell. Since when did Sora give out cheek kisses?

Sora held on to Riku tightly, as if he might disappear. "I missed you, but I know you were always with me."

Donald almost had to drag Sora off the poor man. "Maybe you should get Riku some tea."

After a small break for refreshments, Yen Sid announced their results. Sora was overjoyed for Riku, to the point Riku believed he had misheard and that Sora had in fact passed.

 **Ooo**

That evening Riku sat on the edge of the floating island that the Mysterious Tower was built on, legs dangling. He was exhausted, but sleep was evading him, so he came here to watch the world go by and calm his mind. Lots of things had happened, lots of things had come to light. Yen Sid had let on to some things, but would reveal more tomorrow when the keyblade wielders were refreshed. But these were not the things that kept Riku up tonight. Instead he was having less world-threatening troubles, although they still concerned the heart. After all this time, maybe the moment had come to speak up about certain feelings he had. Earlier, for a moment, he had thought he'd lost Sora to sleep. In that moment he worried about losing his friend again for another long period of time; a year was quite long enough. Even if nothing came of it, he at least wanted Sora to know how he felt. The last thing he wanted was to fall into darkness without him knowing. To fall with regret in his heart.

"Riku!"

Sora came over and crouched beside him.

"I thought you were sleeping," Riku said.

"I think I've done enough of that today."

Riku cocked a brow. "Was it that restful for you?"

"No, but I think I've got a bit of a sugar rush from all that cake."

Of course, that made sense.

"But why are you sitting out here all alone, Riku?"

"Couldn't sleep."

"Oh." Sora knew Riku had trouble sleeping. He learnt all about the nightmares that plague his friend in the run up to their exam. "Wanna talk about it?"

Riku stared out at the forest on an island in the distance as he contemplated his answer.

Sora put a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay." He was about to leave, but Riku caught his hand.

"Don't go."

So he joined Riku in dangling his legs off the side of the island. Silence filled the air. Sora sat there wanting to be the one to break it, but he waited patiently for Riku to come up with the words.

No words came at first; he only took Sora's hand and held it. Sora continued to wait, sneaking a peak a Riku's face for some indication of what was coming.

"I –"

No, no, _no_. He thought he had built up the courage to come right out with it, but at the last moment it caught in his throat.

"Riku…" Sora was at a loss too. He was growing more concerned every second. "Would you rather talk to Mickey? Or maybe Lea?"

"No, it's not… It's not about the nightmares or anything."

That was a relief, and Sora let out a sigh. "Is it something else that happened today then? Or during our time in the dream world?"

"Not really, kind of…"

"Riku, if you don't want to talk about it, then you don't have to."

"No. I need to tell you." He just didn't know if he could make his lips form the words. But he was this far into working himself up; he couldn't duck out now.

"Right now? Maybe you want to do it tomorrow?"

"No, I'm almost ready. Just…shhh for a moment." In that moment Riku relaxed his body as much as he could, and cleared his mind. With his eyes closed he took a deep breath, and then as quickly as he could, in one breath, he said, "I love you, Sora."

"I love you too," Sora replied without skipping a beat.

Riku gave him a look of disbelief. He had just spent all this time and energy getting these words out, and here was Sora saying them nonchalantly.

"What?" Sora asked.

"You." Riku sighed. Why did he have to make this so much more difficult? No, not today. He was done. Riku stood up.

"Hey, wait, Riku! Riku, no, what's wrong?" Sora began to hurry after him. He grabbed a wrist with both hands and forced Riku to stop. "What was that all about? Why do you look mad?"

Riku shook his head. "Do you know how hard it was for me to say that?"

"I dunno, I guess it's not very Riku-like. But I'm glad you said it!" Sora smiled. "It's good for you to say things like that to your friends from time to time."

That one stung. He was going to have to plan to make it more obvious to Sora. An idea struck him. One last chance for today. Something he would just have to do. Surely his limbs would comply more than his voice?

He took a two steps closer to Sora and cupped Sora's face in his hands. He looked down into inquisitive eyes and in that moment he almost lost his nerve. Without wasting any more time he leaned in and planted a kiss on Sora's forehead. He turned away without taking in Sora's face which was now scrunched up in confusion.

"That wasn't very Riku-like either. You're acting very strange – oh – is this payback for earlier?"

Riku froze on the first step up to the door. "What do you mean?"

"I gave you a kiss too." He pressed a finger to Riku's cheek. "To say thank you for bringing me back."

Ah…that was all it was? He continued up the steps. "It wasn't payback, Sora. Just have a think about all this sometime for me."

Sora stood there scratching his head.

 **Ooo**

Riku slept well that night, having at least tried to get it off his chest. But at breakfast Sora showed no sign of having figured anything out. He narrowed his eyes at Riku to try and see if he was missing anything.

There was no chance to talk before the meeting. It ran for some time, with the conclusion that Riku was to depart on a mission 3 days from then, while Sora stayed to train with the other wielders. Riku was going to the Realm of Darkness, and his fear of losing Sora was heightened. He now had a time limit in which to get through to that blockhead he loved.

"Tough ride, eh?" Lea said as Riku passed him on the way out to his new brooding spot on the island's edge.

"What do you mean?"

"Sora," he said. "Just as blind as Roxas if you ask me."

Riku frowned.

"Didn't mean to pry, but I happened to be looking out the window at the time."

"Did you get through to Roxas?"

"Eventually."

"Any tips?" Riku asked.

Lea hummed. "I don't know if you've got the balls for it, but a kiss on the lips worked a treat for me. Sora's been to enough worlds and met enough people in love to know what that means, I'm sure. Or at least I'd hope whatever's left of Rox in there would kick his butt into gear."

Riku didn't know what to say. It was surely a sore subject for Lea still. "Thanks for the advice."

"I'm rooting for you."

He had barely sat down when Sora joined him. "Hey, Riku. You're leaving me again."

"I know… It's not like I have a choice."

"Heheh, you get to go out there and do cool keyblade master things. I can't wait for you to come back and tell me all about it." Sora smiled as he thought about what kinds of things those would be. "Say, Riku, what was last night really about? I know you told me to think about it – and I really did try, but… I don't know. It felt like you were trying to say goodbye to me. I'm worried about you."

"What? Why would you think that?"

"You weren't joking. You were so serious… And you did and said things that aren't like you. I wondered if maybe you were saying these things because you wanted me to know you cared before you left. Riku, I know you care. You don't have to do anything more than you already do to tell me that. But please, tell me the truth."

"Sora…" He hadn't meant to worry the other so much.

Suddenly Sora grabbed his hand. "Riku, don't keep it to yourself! Let us help you if you're having problems! I won't let you go!"

Riku gazed into those deep blue eyes and saw the passion in Sora's eyes. He smiled and put his other hand around Sora's. "Sora, listen to me, it's not like that. I'm okay, really. Please don't worry about me like that."

"I always will, Riku, until…until the end!"

Riku's chest tightened at that. Surely he didn't deserve someone like Sora in his life. "Master Yen Sid wouldn't have given me this mission if I couldn't handle it, remember that. But, Sora, I decided to tell you _that_ last night just in case…" Internally Riku sighed at his own inability to repeat the phrase. "In case anything does happen to me – be it this mission or another one."

Sora's shoulders relaxed and he let go of Riku's hand. "I'm glad you're okay, Riku. And I believe you'll do a good job retrieving Aqua. But sometimes I just worry about losing you again."

"I'm pleased we cleared up this misunderstanding of yours, but you've still failed to grasp what I was saying last night."

"Oh…um…" Sora hummed. "Well, I kinda got stuck with all these thoughts about you falling into darkness and…yeah, I didn't come up with any other alternatives."

"As much as I'd love to hear what you'd come up with next time, I don't think I can wait any longer. I need you to understand before I leave on my mission."

Sora frowned. "I don't know, Riku, I mean, what else is there to understand. It isn't like you said much except that you love –"

Riku put a finger to his lips. "Shut your eyes." It would be much easier if Sora wasn't watching him and his uncertainty.

"Fine." Sora did as requested. He listened as Riku exhaled, then felt a hand tilt his chin in Riku's direction. Just as he was about to ask what this was all about, he felt lips against his own. He cracked open his eyes to see Riku there – of course it was – but this could have been a set up for someone else, right?

It was a chaste kiss, and very brief, but long enough to get the message across, he hoped. He pulled back from Sora slowly, watching closely for any reaction.

Sora's lips parted and slowly made an 'oh.' It was fascinating to watch the understanding dawn on his face. "I think I get it, Riku."

Riku had no hope, and in the seconds that passed a dozen ridiculous ideas flew threw his head regarding Sora's next words. But Sora left him hanging, just staring at Riku with brows furrowed. He did not consider himself impatient, but his heart couldn't continue beating at this rate for the eternity it was taking Sora to say something.

"Sora?"

"Yeah?" he asked as if Riku had not just been waiting for him to say something.

"I need some feedback?"

"Your lips are soft."

Riku could have cried with frustration. From behind a nearby tree they heard a snigger.

"Fuck off, Lea," Riku called.

"Alright, alright. Good luck!" he strolled back inside as the pair watched him go.

"What was that all about?" Sora asked. "Was that a dare?"

"No, Sora, _no_." Riku sighed and muttered under his breath, "I'll kill him." He put a hand on Sora's face, making sure that there was eye contact for this next part. "Sora, I love you, okay? I love you more than you know. I love you like I've never loved anyone before."

There was no change of expression in Sora's face, and Riku worried he hadn't been clear enough.

"Sora, I love you like Mickey loves Minnie. Like Aladdin loves Jasmine. Like –"

"I get it, Riku," Sora said. "In a romantic way, right? That's what you were trying to tell me, but I was too dense to see it." They gazed into each other's eyes, searching. "Aw, c'mon, Riku, that was the part where you tell me I'm not dense!"

"I wouldn't lie to you, Sora."

"Man, that hurts."

"Sora, I need you to tell me how you feel. I need to know."

In typical Sora-fashion, he shrugged. "I don't know, Riku. I've never really been able to tell the difference between friends and more-than-friends. But you're definitely my best friend. If I only got one friend, it'd be you."

"You know, I always thought that you loved Kairi more…like a girlfriend."

Sora laughed. "No, everyone always thought that, but she's my friend just like you are. I guess everyone thought it was different because we looked out for her so much – we _both_ did. But it's not like I ever had to look out for you back then. You were stronger than both of us."

Riku smiled, having got that information out there. He knew that Sora and Kairi had been the way they always were, but he had never been sure if Sora had more feelings for her than he let on.

"How do you know when you love someone romantically, Riku? How do you know you love me that way?"

"I…er…" Sometimes Sora asked the most difficult questions. "You just _know_ , I guess?" But Sora was waiting patiently for a better answer. "I… I want to protect you like no one ever before. I want to see your bright smile every day I live. I want to share my happiest moments with you."

"This sounds a lot like our friendship already."

"Yeah, but it's more intense. Like… Spending every possible minute with you. Telling you repeatedly how you're the love and light of my life. Holding your hand when we're out."

"You can hold my hand if you ask."

"But would you hold someone else's hand?"

Sora shrugged. "I guess if they're my friend I would. I don't see the big deal."

Riku smiled. "That's because you're _you_. I wouldn't do that. To me it's something you do with someone you love. Would you kiss a friend? On the lips, I mean."

"No. That's definitely something special. It means a lot to people."

"Good, I'm glad you get it. Because that special thing about it, that's how I know I love you. I want to kiss you, Sora. I don't feel like that about other people."

"So if I want to kiss someone then I like them romantically?" Sora asked for clarification.

"I wouldn't say it was that simple, but it's a pretty strong indication."

Sora hummed, having already guessed what was coming next.

"Do you want to kiss me, Sora?"

This seemed like a simple yes or no question, but Sora wasn't fond of being so definite in this instance. "I don't know, Riku. I feel like picking a side will change our friendship."

"Well, if you say no then we will continue on as always. But I wasn't asking… I just wanted to know how you felt."

Sora frowned. "You say it won't change things, but it will. If I say no then I'll still know how you feel and…"

Riku was beginning to think telling Sora had been a bad idea. Suddenly he was looking for a way out of this.

"But I don't want to say yes and not mean it. Because when you kissed me, I didn't _not_ like it. Actually…I did like it a bit. Because it was you. And I thought, wow, Riku is this close to me. Riku likes me this much to do this. And…" Sora bit his lip as the feelings welled up. "I was happy. I'm so happy for you. And deep down I know I'm glad it was me." He didn't realise he was crying as he shuffled closer to Riku. "I want to make you happy, Riku."

Just as Sora was about to lean in for a kiss, Riku stopped him. "No, Sora, I don't want you to do this because you think it'll make me happy. Only if _you_ want this."

He pushed his forehead to Riku's. "I want to try it for myself. Let me kiss you, Riku."

Riku let his hand drop, and Sora leaned in once more. He brushed his lips against Riku's, letting them linger there for longer than Riku had dared.

When he pulled away he looked up into Riku's eyes, and Riku held his gaze. "Yeah, I think I do like kissing you. It makes my heart…flutter in a way I don't understand."

Riku took Sora's hand and placed it against his chest, so Sora could feel Riku's racing heart. "I feel the same."

Sora smiled and took Riku's hand to mimic the action. "This changes things, right?"

"No. I still care for you exactly the same way, but now I won't be afraid to steal a kiss from you."

"I don't know…I feel like I learnt something tonight about my feelings. About my heart."

"I hope you did," Riku said aloud accidentally, a bit more sarcastic than he would have liked.

"Hey, you two!" Lea called. "Dinner's ready!"

 **Ooo**

Sora lay awake for longer than usual that night. He couldn't stop thinking about his conversation with Riku, and the idea that he loved him. It seemed bizarre that he hadn't realised it before. His heart always leapt whenever he was reunited with Riku, but he always thought that was just a natural response. He got the same with the others, right? In as much detail as he could remember he went back through his memories and replayed those times. When he saw Kairi again in the Castle That Never Was… When he saw Donald and Goofy again after they'd thought this was all over… But these emotions didn't compare to the elation he felt when he saw Riku. When he saw Riku, he never wanted to let him out of his sight again. Even though he knew Riku could handle himself better than all his other friends, he worried for Riku the most.

Jeez, it all seemed so obvious now he sat down and thought about it. His heart was thumping just at the thought of how much he liked Riku. So this was love, then? He wondered how obvious it was to onlookers. Surely Riku had been able to see it? He wasn't an idiot after all. But he, himself, had been blind enough not to see how much Riku cared. He felt like an idiot.

So, this made Riku his boyfriend, right? Sora blushed at the thought. It was weird when he thought about it that way… Having an 'other half' as he'd heard some people call it. Would he have to introduce Riku like that to new people? It wasn't a strange concept – he had met so many people who offhandedly introduced partners – but the fact _he_ now had one… It was odd. He hadn't really thought much about himself in a relationship. Now he thought about it, it seemed like such an intimate thing to announce. Sora laughed at himself. Here he was, always yelling about how much he loved his friends, and now the idea of saying one was more than a friend seemed too much.

He had to tell Kairi first. This was going to change everything, right? He could no longer claimed he loved them both equally if Riku was his boyfriend, right? What if Kairi felt left out? Maybe all these dynamic changes were too much… Maybe he should tell Riku he wanted to forget the way his heart beat for him.

Having complicated everything and making his brain hurt, Sora soon found himself asleep as some kind of coping mechanism.

 **ooo**

The next day at breakfast, Sora sat down opposite Kairi and found she was beaming at him. He gave a confused grin.

"I'm so happy for you both, Sora!" she said.

"Huh? Wha?" He shoved some toast into his mouth.

"You and Riku –"

Sora almost spat out said toast. "HUH?"

Kairi giggled at his reaction. "If you were trying to hide it, you're doing a bad job."

"No…it's just… Did Riku tell you already?" He hadn't expected Riku to say anything to anyone. Not yet… I mean, it hadn't even been a whole day.

"Oh, no." Kairi frowned and wondered if she should have waited for one of them to tell her themselves. "Lea…um, kind of let it slip. Maybe we shouldn't let him drink anymore. Last night he just asked Riku about it and Riku didn't deny anything. And then it was so sad, because Lea really misses Roxas and he kind of started monologuing about him…"

"Seems like I missed a lot last night."

"Well, I doubt anything would have been said if you were there. When you're around he really tries not to talk about Roxas. I've noticed it already."

Sora frowned, not sure what to say. He couldn't be Roxas for Lea, but neither could he talk about Roxas to him. He knew nothing about Roxas' time with Axel other than some basics. He concluded that it would be painful and awkward for them both.

"Anyway, who else knows?" Sora asked.

"Mickey was there too. I don't know if he's passed on the message, but I won't tell anyone else."

Sora sighed. "Seems like the whole Tower will know before lunch."

"I'm sure they'll all be happy too. Mickey was so pleased for Riku, you know. I mean – you as well, but he really looks out for Riku."

"But why is everyone so happy?" Sora asked. "Aren't you worried about our friendship and how it'll change?"

Kairi shook her head. "I know we'll still be friends just like we always were. Just because you have more feelings for Riku now, doesn't mean you have less for me, right?"

"Yeah, you're right."

"Besides, it's always a happy time when two people realise how much they care for each other. You can't help but feel joy for them! Especially people as well suited as you and Riku."

Sora let a goofy smile paint his face. "Yeah! I'm so glad you're here, Kairi. I spent all night worrying about this, but it was all for nothing."

She laughed at him. "Oh, Sora…"

 **ooo**

The next 2 days passed by quickly. Nothing really changed much, contrary to Sora's expectations. Riku kissed his head when he came down for breakfast, and during their downtime if they were sitting together then there was a lot more contact than usual. Sora still cracked silly jokes that Riku sighed at, and Riku still faked fights on the stairs. Everything was as it should be. But before he went to bed, Riku would pull him close and kiss him. That was Sora's favourite part.

Then Riku was gone. Off on his mission with Mickey. Sora had held him tighter than ever before he left, whispering him luck and a safe journey. Those were the longest 10 days Sora had ever lived through. He spent the time helping to train Kairi and Lea.

 **ooo**

"Sora! They're back!" He didn't really register who yelled it, for he was already running full-pelt down the stairs. It was a wonder he didn't trip and crack his head open before he got to Riku. He didn't even notice the other person they'd brought back. He only saw Riku – unharmed as far as he could tell. Riku opened his arms to catch Sora who had decided to leap the last few feet between them, but the force with which Sora collided with him sent them both to the floor.

"Riku! I missed you!"

"Jeez, Sora, we weren't gone that long…were we?" Riku asked, remembering how Aqua hadn't passed 10 years in the same way as the Realm of Light did.

"Ten days!" Sora yelled. "It was so _long_ , Riku!"

"Is that all?"

"We did a good job." Mickey nodded.

Riku pulled them both up, really looking forward to sitting in one of those comfy chairs in the tower. "I watched you sleep for a year, you know. That was pretty long if you ask me."

"That's different – you knew I was ok."

"Well, yeah, but how did I know that you'd…nevermind." He was going to say 'recognise me' but he hadn't looked like himself.

"What, Riku?"

"Naminé could have wiped me from your memories."

"You could have been lost to the darkness forever. I don't think these things are equal."

Sora was eventually introduced to Aqua once they were upstairs and seated with everyone else. She didn't stay to talk to them though, having been summoned to the top of the tower to see Master Yen Sid. The three of them had looked so exhausted, but Aqua particularly. For once, Sora stayed up later than Riku, and recounted what little he remembered of meeting Aqua many years ago.

 **Ooo**

The first night back was difficult. As if his brain had decided that _now_ was the time to have bad dreams and thoughts about the darkness. All the time he'd been in that realm it had been far too easy for him to get by. His mind had been waiting for him to return here to torture him. He thought of Sora, his light, as he had done so while he'd been away, but it wasn't working now. Now that he _knew_ he was safe. Now he _knew_ Sora was just across the way. Now that his mind thought it would be fun to plague him like this.

The third time he jolted awake he had the lingering image of Ansem with Sora in his arms. And worse, he knew it wasn't himself in Ansem's form. No, the man was smirking at him, and he knew that he had wanted to drag Sora into the darkness with him.

 _Stop._

It was no use thinking it over-and-over again. The more he thought about things, the more they recurred in his dreams, and the more he started to blur the line between his nightmares and reality.

The clock showed just after 3 in the morning. No one else would be awake, and he wouldn't rouse Sora over this. He just had to wait it out. The image flashed in his mind again involuntarily.

 _Fine_.

So his brain wanted to think about Sora? It was time to think about Sora more than he'd ever thought about him. He had him in his mind now. That bright smile, those shining eyes. Then he added himself in, pulling Sora close, inhaling his scent. The kiss he laid on his lips was deeper than any he had ever dared to actually bestow upon Sora. Meanwhile he hands touched places he'd never asked to before. The fantasy skipped ahead to the part where he and Sora were embracing completely naked. It was an image of pure light and reminded him of some old paintings he'd seen.

In order to help these thoughts he had touched himself – places he was imagining touching Sora, and places he imagined Sora would put his hands in return. He hadn't imagined that it would actually work this time, having been so exhausted to start, but he was now turned on enough to act on it. It wasn't a fool-proof plan, but it was one of the more successful things he could do to re-wire his brain for the night.

Stroking himself to the thought of Sora was something else now their feelings were out. He had always tried to keep it to a minimum before so things didn't get too weird for him, but sometimes he just had to let his frustrations over the boy out. With every twist and turn he put into the fantasy, he wondered if Sora would actually be up for this.

There was a knock at the door, followed by a "Riku?"

He had been so engrossed in his own mind that he hadn't even heard the person making their way across the landing.

The door opened and he cursed himself for never locking it. "Riku, are you alright?" Sora asked with as much concern one could at 3am.

In that moment Riku had sat bolt upright, and had luckily been under the covers already.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"It sounded like you were having a nightmare."

Oh, Sora…so innocent. Of course, he had just been handed a perfect excuse, but whenever Sora had caught him in a bad dream, he had always insisted he stay until Riku fell asleep again. Naturally, Sora never kept his promise, and always fell asleep first, usually slumped against the wall, and Riku would carry him to the bed and sleep on the floor instead. But just having Sora in the room kept the dark thoughts at bay. How he would love to have Sora with him now. But they hadn't discussed going any further than a kiss, so Riku had no intention of letting Sora know what he had actually been doing by extending that invitation.

"Oh, no, I was er…doing sit-ups." Riku fell back on the bed and did one for show.

"Ok…you're so weird, Riku, but that's good to know, anyway, I need to pee!" Sora pulled the door to and Riku listened as he rushed off. Then he waited to make sure he included a number alongside the sit-up he did when Sora passed by on the way back to his room.

Riku continued, more aware of how loud he was being. And for the rest of the night his dreams were filled with nothing but Sora.


	2. Chapter 2

Sora was floating there on the Altar of Naught. Riku was running towards him, but never getting any closer. The altar's floor turned into a dark pool and Sora began to be swallowed up by it. He would never reach the boy in time…

He felt a hand on his shoulder and pulled out his keyblade, knowing it would be Ansem. It always was.

"Woah! Riku! Calm down!"

He jolted awake to the sight of Sora holding his wrist up, keyblade pointing towards the ceiling. Quickly he dematerialised the keyblade, realising it had all been a dream.

"Sora…I'm sorry, did I hurt you?"

"No. Are you okay, Riku?" he asked as he clasped Riku's now keyblade-less hand.

"Yeah, just another dream."

"You must have been pretty deep in it. You didn't even hear me come in."

Riku didn't want to think about whether there had been any sound in the nightmare. He didn't want to think about it at all. He sat up and pulled Sora close. "You're safe, that's all that matters."

Sora wanted to say something. He wanted to talk about getting Riku some help. This was the 5th time Sora had come in and found Riku tossing and turning in a cold sweat. And that was 5 times too many. What about the times he hadn't known about? How often had this happened and Riku never mentioned it? Who could help out? Surely Riku had already been to Mickey and Yen Sid about this? Well, if he hadn't, he certainly was tomorrow.

But he said nothing for now. He just let Riku hold onto him while he calmed himself.

This time there was no question about Sora staying; it was a given. Except this time Sora wedged himself on the bed between Riku and the wall, and Riku nuzzled into Sora's chest, wanting to be surrounded by his personal light. Sora found it cute, and silently stroked Riku's hair until he stirred no more. Somehow it was Riku who fell asleep first this time.

"Sora…" Riku ran a thumb across his cheek.

"Nng?"

"It's already 9, you should get up."

He cracked open an eye and saw that Riku had already been up and got dressed. It wasn't the cute morning wake-up call he'd imagined as he drifted off last night.

"Riku…I want you to talk to someone about these nightmares."

"I won't have nightmares if you stay with me every night like that. You're my guiding light."

 _That_ was a bit more sap than Sora had come to expect from Riku. "Well, I won't stay if you don't try and get help."

"But I only need _your_ help."

"Riku, please. You need something for when I'm not here. You know we won't always be together, and then I'll worry about you." Sora frowned. "Don't lie to me and say you'll be _fine_. Don't lie to yourself."

Riku sighed. "I guess I'm not getting out of this one."

When Riku aired his problems, he found that Aqua had been suffering from something similar, but really, hers were much worse. Coming back to the Realm of Light after so long was not as easy as everyone had hoped. Sometimes Aqua would have hallucinations of Terra and Ven when she wasn't engaging with others. As such, they tried to keep her busy all day, or at least have one person with her at all times. Master Yen Sid was sure that it would pass soon, but 10 years of her life was a long time to leave behind suddenly.

So Riku ended up joining Aqua in some of her sessions with Yen Sid, where he discussed darkness and light, and how to manage them within oneself.

Whether any of it helped, Riku didn't know, because Sora had kept his end of the bargain and stayed with Riku at night. Before, Riku had dreaded the thought of sleep, but now he couldn't wait for night to fall, for him to be able to hold Sora close as he drifted off to a dreamless sleep. Alone, without others watching, they found themselves closer, touching in ways they wouldn't otherwise. Those nights that Riku spent with Sora were some of the best he'd ever had, and they always made him smile whenever he thought of them.

They would lay there facing each other, talking about something or other, like the fact that Sora really missed his Mother's cooking, and then there would be a moment of silence. In that moment their eyes would meet, and without a word they'd move in closer and share a long gentle kiss. _God_ , Riku loved those kisses so much. He wanted them to last longer, for them to be deeper, to be more frequent. But that was the magic of them at the time. The fact was that it was always Riku who broke it off. He wasn't ready to cross the line he so badly wanted to cross. Yet Sora never said anything about it. Instead, he just smiled and turned away so that Riku could spoon him as he fell asleep.

 **Ooo**

It took a few weeks, but soon enough Aqua was back in the world of light, hopefully for good. Everyone was glad to have her functioning again, but they all realised that meant it was time for the real work to begin.

Master Yen Sid called a meeting, and the 3 day timer was set. Sora was to search for Ven, while Riku was once again paired with Mickey, this time to seek out Terra.

"Sora…are you happy with how this is going?"

"With how what's going?" Sora asked as he continued packing what few belongings he had.

"Our relationship," Riku said. "Is there anything missing for you?"

"No? I'm really enjoying it." He paused to beam a smile at Riku. "My favourite bit is when we cuddle at night. I never thought it'd be so nice to have someone so close, especially in our small beds. Why? Don't you feel the same?"

"I do, but…" Maybe actions were better than words… No, he had decided this way was best. "Don't you feel something when we kiss?"

"Of course I do! My heart still flutters the way it did on the first day."

Riku put a hand to his face. "You don't feel anything _else_?"

"Err…no? Am I supposed to?" Sora paused what he was doing to think about it. "Riku, kiss me, so I can figure it out."

"That won't help. You either know it or you don't."

Sora pouted. "Stop being so cryptic! Just tell me what you're talking about, Riku."

Riku sighed. "Sex. I was wondering if you ever thought about it."

That had Sora pause for a moment. "But, people do that to make babies. Do you want a baby, Riku?"

Riku had almost forgotten that he was dating the most clueless boy he'd ever met. "Sora, you're kidding right? Don't you know anything?"

Sora took offense. "Well, I'm sorry, Riku, but when you guys used to have your little 'sex jokes' back on the island and I never understood them, you never bothered explaining them either. And then I spent a year asleep and learned nothing. And when I _was_ awake I was a little busy doing other things."

"I guess, when you put it that way… Back then you were so innocent I didn't want to spoil your pure mind."

"I don't get why you guys used to call them 'dirty' jokes when it's clearly a natural thing."

Riku was blown away momentarily by Sora's maturity. "Yeah, well so is shitting, but that's not getting cleaner any time soon. Have you ever touched yourself, Sora?"

Sora wouldn't look a fool this time. He knew that this phrase was one that had gone over his head several times in the past, but not now. "Yeah, of course."

Riku sighed with relief. At least this wasn't absolutely hopeless. "Recently?"

"Yeah?"

"And what did you think about?"

"Err…" Oh, that wasn't a good sign. "I dunno. Axel kept popping up as usual, though."

"Lea?"

"No, Axel." Sora put his fingers to his cheeks. "Ever since Roxas and I became one again, Axel's face appears more and more as I get to the end."

"Well, I can't have that. You need to think about me, Sora. You're not dating _him_ after all."

"Alright, I will. But why does it matter?"

Riku wanted to bang his head on the chair he was sitting on. "Please, Sora, don't you ever wonder what Roxas and Axel did? I mean, why else would that part of Roxas be remembering Axel when you're climaxing?"

"They were really good friends?"

"No, Sora, they were fucking."

"In my defence, Riku, I don't have access to Roxas' memories, and Lea keeps Roxas-talk to a minimum these days."

"I know, it's probably harder for you to see it. I know," Riku repeated as if to remind himself that Sora knew less about his nobody than one should. "Look, Sora, I'm just asking if at some point we could try touching each other's dicks or something." He was tired of beating around the bush.

That managed to elicit a blush from Sora. "Oh…is that what they were doing? I guess it makes sense. Sure, we can try that."

Well, that was easier than expected. In some ways.

Sora said they'd try it out that night, and Riku found it was an agonising wait for a time where it seemed reasonable to retire for the night. All through the day he thought about how it would play out, but every time he looked at Sora the other never gave an indication he had given it another thought.

Riku ended up in his favourite brooding spot for a while after dinner.

"Everything alright, buddy?" Lea asked. "Haven't seen you here for a while."

"Say, Lea, can I ask you something? You don't have to answer."

"Yeah, go on."

Riku found he couldn't even look at the other while he asked, "How did Roxas like to get off?" It was surely a question Lea didn't even want to _think_ about.

There was a short pause before Lea said or did anything. "More than anything he liked to have his dick sucked, but y'know, I'm a master with my tongue, so I couldn't blame him. But it was never hard to please him, he always seemed so sensitive and receptive to every touch. I doubt you've got much to worry about with Sora. Good luck." Lea patted Riku on the shoulder as he got up to leave, not wanting more questions like that tonight.

"Lea…thanks." He wanted to tell Lea that Roxas was still thinking of him, but it didn't seem appropriate at that moment. It was probably best to come from Sora anyway.

When he returned to the tower, Sora had already gone up to bed, but not to Riku's room as usual. Riku knocked on Sora's door, and was invited in.

"Can we do it here, Riku?"

"Sure. Don't you like my room?"

Sora shook his head. "No, I just feel better in here." He walked over and locked the door, something that no one ever did in this place, Riku noted. "I've never thought about doing this _with_ someone."

"Well, you see, Sora, when two people love each other…" He saw Sora's face and stopped with the patronising tone. "Seriously, couples share their pleasure all the time. I'm surprised you didn't naturally come to this conclusion."

"I get by fine on my own. I don't really care about doing it, but sometimes my body just wants me to."

Riku cocked a brow. "Really?"

"Well, I like to sometimes because it relaxes me, but when we were travelling all over those worlds it was really awkward trying to find a time and a place for it. The three of us often shared a room, and that just didn't fly."

Riku unzipped his shirt and threw it over the chair. "The perks of travelling alone, I guess." He undid his belt and let his combats fall to the floor.

But none of this was new to Sora; Riku always slept in only his boxers. Yet something was different now, knowing what was coming.

Riku dived onto the bed and inhaled the scent of Sora in the sheets. "I think your bed is comfier."

"Eh, debatable," he said, joining Riku. "So, how are we doing this?"

"Shh." Riku put a finger to Sora's lips and patted the mattress. Sora laid down facing Riku, just as they always did. Riku leaned in for the kiss, long and deep. But this time Riku did not pull away as Sora had come to expect. He continued to deepen the kiss as one hand tangled itself in Sora's hair and the other travelled down to squeeze his ass. In the end it was Sora who had to pull away to catch his breath.

"That was different," Sora gasped.

"Did you like it?"

"Yeah, it was more intense…"

Now Riku's initial frustration was out of the way, he could focus on teasing Sora a little more. He moved so Sora was on his back, and he was above. This way he could kiss Sora more. A slow, sensual kiss on the lips, followed by one on the jaw, and then the neck.

"Can I take this off?" Riku asked before getting the go-ahead to remove Sora's top.

Suddenly he felt a bit naked and shy. But as Riku looked down at him, he knew Riku didn't care what he looked like; Riku loved him anyway. It was just the ghost of an old rivalry that he wanted to be as physically fit as Riku.

Riku continued with his kisses, planting one on Sora's collarbone and then in the centre of his chest. Sora watched as Riku kissed his nipple and sucked on the nub until it hardened and Sora felt a shiver go down his spine. Riku brushed a thumb against his other nipple and Sora felt the pleasure begin to build within him. Sora had never given much thought to his chest aiding him like this, but Riku seemed to think it was important, as he continued to tease until Sora recoiled away from the touch, having become over-stimulated. Instead he continued to move down Sora's body, remembering that the boy was still slightly ticklish around the stomach. Riku smirked and let his hands loose on Sora.

"No, Riku!" Sora laughed. "That's not fair!"

"Tough luck." Riku continued until he had Sora wrapped around his hand, stopping him from doing any more.

Sora stayed there, catching his breath, wondering how best to get Riku back.

"I couldn't help myself," Riku said. "I wanted to get you moving a bit. How is this so far?"

"I don't know, Riku… Maybe you don't deserve to do more if you pull mean tricks like that!" Sora was smiling though, unable to deliver the line with a straight face. He sat up and kissed Riku, pulling him back down. "Have you done this before?"

"No."

That made Sora feel better about not having a clue how this was going to pan out. But something in the back of his mind was glad that Riku hadn't touched someone else like this. He liked being the only one.

Riku ran a hand down Sora's body, until he hit his belt, at which point he looked at Sora who gazed back expectantly. Sora found it quite amusing that Riku would ask to do this and then be hesitant at this moment. Without breaking their gaze, Riku let his hand slide down the front of Sora's shorts, disappointed Sora wasn't as hard as expected. Because damn, if Sora had kissed _him_ like that, he'd be begging to be touched. Well, he guessed he'd thought this would be a walk in the park after talking to Lea. Instead he was given the opportunity to caress Sora through the fabric, getting to experience it from the very start.

Sora didn't know what to do now. Was this the part where he did the same for Riku? Or did he just enjoy the moment? Should he offer to take his shorts off? Kissing Riku again seemed like a cop-out of doing something more proactive, but that was what he went with to start. He wish he hadn't have because he let slip a few small moans into the kiss. Riku was looking at him funny now…

"Riku…?"

Riku grabbed Sora by the belt. "Let me take these off." He said it as nicely as he could in that moment, but God did he want more than this.

"Yeah, go ahead."

Within seconds Riku had the belt unbuckled and Sora's shorts pooled around his ankles. He didn't both taking them off, as he had he access he wanted like this. One arm wrapped around Sora's thigh while the other guided Sora's dick to his mouth.

Sora barely had time to process any of this before he was overwhelmed by the sensation of Riku's mouth surrounding him. It was unexpected, but not unwelcome. Had Riku really not done this before? The way his tongue swirled around the tip was setting Sora on fire.

"R-Riku…" He didn't want this to stop, but if Riku had just finished taking off his shorts then maybe we could feel like the circulation in his right foot wasn't being cut off. "Riku, stop."

He didn't have to be told twice. "What's wrong?"

Sora pushed him off and freed his foot before motioning for Riku to come closer. Now he took his turn to try touching Riku, who was clearly turned on already as Sora looked down at the tent in Riku's pants. Awkwardly, he palmed Riku's erection and Riku let out a sigh of relief.

"Fuck, Sora…" Who knew it would feel so good to just have someone brush again him like that? He pulled his boxers down so that Sora was no longer restricted by the fabric.

Without pausing, Sora took hold of Riku's dick and began to pump it. He liked the way that Riku became putty in his hands, the way Riku was breathing so heavily, trying not to moan.

"Do you like this, Riku? Or should I use my mouth?"

Riku's eyes widened at the suggestion. "Sora…if you did that… _fuck._ " He couldn't even imagine how good that would feel. "You don't have to do what I did. Just do what you want, because it all feels amazing to me."

Sora had not even considered the idea of putting dicks in mouths before this evening, but having experienced how fantastic it was, he couldn't not do the same for Riku. After all, it was Riku who had shown him it. He just really hoped Riku would do it again before they were done.

Even Sora's experimental lick was enough to make Riku let a gasp slip out. And when he dived right in, Riku couldn't help but be a little bit more vocal. He gripped the sheets tightly as he let Sora know just how much he was enjoying this. But he found he was met with a hand over his mouth.

"Riku, you're being too loud. Someone's going to complain."

"Fuck them, this is the best thing I've ever experienced, and I want you to know that."

Sora pouted. "Riku, that's not nice. I guess I'll have to silence you myself." He leaned in and kissed Riku as his hand continued to stroke and pump.

This was not as good as being able to moan freely, but there was something about the way Sora was stifling his moans that was a real turn on. He got involved again, rubbing his thumb in circles around Sora's tip, agonisingly slowly. It certainly got the reaction he was hoping for as Sora's muffled moans joined his own, and his hips moved, searching for more.

"Sora…"

"Mmm?"

"I'm gonna…" Riku thought it was only polite to let Sora know.

"Huh?" Sadly Sora didn't get the message Riku was trying to convey.

Riku let out the most satisfied moan he'd ever heard himself make as he released all over his stomach. Everything stopped in that moment as his body relaxed and he caught his breath.

"Sora, stop," Riku begged.

"Oh, right." Sora had been too busy watching the pleasure in Riku's face, he hadn't registered the wetness on his hand. He looked at it and decided he definitely didn't want to wipe it on his sheets. Maybe he should just wipe it on Riku, seeing as he was covered with it already.

Riku took his hand and licked it clean.

"That's…weird. You know, I did have tissues on my desk." Which he probably should have thought about before starting.

"Yeah, I'll take some for the rest," Riku said. "Unless you were offering to lap it up."

Sora didn't take long to think about that one, deciding he wasn't ready for that just yet. He did, however, take care wiping all the cum off of Riku's torso.

Then he fell back into Riku's arms, quite aware that the heat between his legs wasn't dealt with.

"Now, where was I?" Riku asked as he kissed Sora. "Before you interrupted me." He pushed Sora down on the bed and nestled between his legs once more, taking in his whole length.

Sora was ready for the rush of pleasure this time. Yet this time was better than the last…for every move Riku made had Sora so close to the edge, arching his back, trying not to buck his hips up into Riku's face.

"Go faster, Riku…"

Now that Riku was spent, he had all the time in the world to spend driving Sora up the wall. Earlier he had been so eager to get it all rolling and have his fill, but now, he could do this all day, just to hear Sora moan and beg.

"Riku, please."

He was so close now. _So close_. But he just needed a little something more to tip him over. He watched as Riku licked his full length like it was an ice cream – but not one that was melting. Then Riku sucked the tip, but too gently – he had kissed Sora with more force than this.

"Argh, Riku, come on," Sora said in a rough tone he never used with Riku.

God, that was _hot_. He wanted to hear Sora talk like that to him more. "Command me, Sora." He licked his lips as he gazed up at Sora.

Now Sora had no idea what Riku's game was, but he sounded like he was ready to do business. "Suck my dick like you mean it."

That would do for today's fun, he thought as he took Sora in his mouth once more. This time he made sure to give the boy what he wanted. He knew he was going at just the right pace because Sora was now moaning liberally without a care in the world for anyone else. Maybe he had pushed him a little too far…

"Don't stop! Ah – yeah, that's…" Sora trailed off into a very pleased sounding hum. And Riku swallowed every last drop of what followed before gently stroking Sora a few more times to help the pleasure linger.

When he re-joined Sora at the pillows, Sora threw himself at Riku, kissing him deeply.

"So, it was good?" Riku asked.

"You were ruthless at the end, but yeah, I'd do it again."

Riku smiled. "Thanks, Sora."

"No, I should be thanking _you_. But why did you only show me this 2 days before we leave? Now I have to spend however much time away from you _not_ doing this."

"Oh, but you see, it will be even more special and wonderful when we get back and haven't seen each other for a while. But you can think of me while we're apart."

"I'm always thinking about you when we're apart. Even before I knew I loved you like this." They exchanged a smile. "But did it live up to your expectations?"

"Everything exceeded them." Riku sighed happily at the memory. "I'll admit that when you told me to stop, I thought that was the end. But _god_ I never wanted it to end."

"Good. Same time tomorrow?"

"Fuck _yes_."

 **Ooo**

Sora woke to the feeling of Riku running a hand through his hair. He rolled towards Riku, snuggling into his chest.

"Wake up, sleepy head."

Sora made a disagreeing sound. He wanted to stay here in Riku's arms, feeling the warmth of Riku's bare skin against his own. But Riku decided it was time to leave the warmth of the bed.

"Nooo, Rikuuu…" Sora moaned, holding onto Riku's wrist.

"But, Sora, what about breakfast? We'll miss it."

Despite wanting to stay there, his stomach betrayed him with a rumble.

They were the last down, most of the others having already been and gone.

"Good night, boys?" Kairi asked.

"Yeah!" Sora said enthusiastically.

Riku put a hand to his face. "Sorry."

"You know we were all secretly cheering you on," Lea said.

Sora cocked a brow and then it began to sink in. "Hey! Riku, I told you - you were being too loud!"

"Me? Did you hear yourself at the end?"

Sora opened his mouth to retort, but found he couldn't say anything against that. Kairi and Lea decided not to take a side, even though they knew _exactly_ who had been the worst offender.

Their last day together passed by in a flash. Neither wanted to leave the other. Riku was beginning to regret saying anything again. No, he _knew_ this was how he wanted it to be. Being parted from Sora was going to be harder than ever, but now he could go and know that Sora loved him, and that he had been true to himself. He could go without regret into whatever fate had instore. Most of all, he knew that he was stronger with the love in his heart. Because when he battled now, he knew he had to fight harder so that he could make it back, because Sora was waiting for him. And if Sora wasn't, then he would be the one to save him.

"You're eager."

Riku had walked into Sora's room to find him already undressed.

"I've been thinking about this all day. Why didn't we do this before?"

He couldn't help but laugh at his boyfriend. "You're so cute. People would think you'd never had an orgasm before."

"Well, not like _that._ "

"Careful now, or you might get bored of them."

"Nah, I wouldn't get bored of _you_."

Riku blushed, caught off-guard by that one. He quickly closed the gap between them so he could lay a kiss on Sora.

"No, but seriously, Riku, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You didn't seem interested."

"How can I be interested in something no one's told me about?! Like I never thought sea salt in ice cream would be a good idea – I'd never even considered it in the first place – but it's so good!"

"Sorry for taking it so slowly, like a good person should," Riku said.

Sora frowned. "Sorry, I'm just a bit excited…"

"I know." Riku ruffled his hair. "One day when you've thought about it a bit more, you'll understand why it's not a good idea to suck someone's dick on the first day."

"Not another Riku-riddle."

"It's not that difficult to understand. But you've known me for so long, it must be hard to picture a relationship where you don't know someone as well."

Sora put his hands inside Riku's jacket as he pulled him close. "Riku, as much as I like hearing you talk and try to teach me new things in life, I'm getting a little chilly."

"Well, you should have waited for me. Nothing new there. Guess I'll just have a catch up." He shrugged off his jacket and hung it on Sora's shoulders. "Tell me what you had in mind for tonight."

"Please suck my dick again."

Riku rolled his eyes and groaned. "Could I have a less romantic boyfriend? Yes, Sora, I promise that'll happen at some point. Why don't you try being a bit more descriptive? Try and excite me just a little."

"Oh…um. I want you to do that thing with your tongue, where you –"

Riku sighed loudly. "Not like that. You sound like a kid asking about a Christmas present." He leant forward slightly so he could whisper against Sora's ear, using a huskier voice. "I want to hear you beg." He ran a hand slowly down Sora's body. "I want you to scream my name for all the world to hear while I drink every last drop you give me."

"But I don't want the others to hear us again."

"I agree they don't _need_ to hear it again. But that was an example of how to talk dirty. I can't really imagine you getting it right, but if you did, I reckon it'd be _hot_."

Sora smirked. "Maybe not tonight, but next time! I'm going to make sure I learn something useful while we're apart."

"Please don't go asking Donald and Goofy…"

"Definitely wasn't what I was thinking." But now Riku had mentioned it, he wondered how useful those two would be for matters like this.

"Now, why don't you help me out of the rest of this so you can show me what you've been thinking about all day?"

 **ooo**

The sound of sometime familiar woke Sora. He knew the tune and began to hum along.

"You didn't forget," Riku said once they'd hummed the rest of the melody.

"Of course I didn't. It was our combined Sound Ideas, after all. It was a really magical moment."

Riku kissed him deeply, knowing it would be one of the last for some time. "We'll be late if we don't get a move on."

"You say that every morning."

"You're always oversleeping. I don't know what you'd do without me as your personal alarm. But, seriously, today's the day."

Sora frowned. "You know, I almost forgot. I wish we had just one more day."

"Yeah, and then another, and then another. Come on, up!"

Just as they were about to leave to meet with everyone else in the main study, Sora stopped Riku.

"I don't want to act like a sap later, so I'll get it over with now," Sora said. "Thank you, Riku. These past few weeks have been great! And I love you, and I already miss you even though you're not gone. Make sure you come back to me, okay?"

"You know I'll be there the moment I'm finished with my mission."

"I'll be waiting." He cupped Riku's face with his hands, taking in the face he loved, hoping that he wouldn't change too much while they were apart. Then he brought their lips together in the last deep kiss they would share for many months. Neither wanted to be the one to break it.

Riku took Sora's hand. "It's time."

Together they ascended the stairs to where everyone was waiting for them.

Sora watched as Riku was sent off first, eyes on each other until there was nothing left to see. But Sora knew Riku was never far, not really. He placed a hand over his heart; Riku and all his friends would be with him forever.


End file.
